Cameroon:Nigeria Love: Hate Affair (My Personal Perspective P1)- Guest Post

I met Marie on Timi’s blog when I was featured here. Her blog is lit! (link at the end of the post) and I’m so honoured to have her here. The post should have been up since Friday (which is when I like to put up guest posts) but I had a bout of back pain (the pain killers I’ve been on since Tuesday became ineffective all at once) and I forgot to post it. Enjoy her scintillating post and watch out for Part 2 (as our nollywood brothers will say)


I started to feel concerned about what the outcome of the recent female African Cup of Nations (Afcon) finals hosted by us (Cameroon) could lead to, when I spoke to a former classmate who paid his Nigerian wife’s ‘bride price’ (Africans generally take this seriously and the marriage starts from there) a week before the said finals. I asked him jokingly why they couldn’t have waited until after the Afcon fever, and he said indeed the had planned to wait but when the knew our two countries were once more going to clash at an afcon final, they preferred not to risk the turnout or outright failure of their marriage…

No joke there, that illustrates what has and still is the Cameroon: Nigeria Love:Hate Affair… in several dimensions… I’ll however limit my write up to my own personal perspective 🙂


And it came to pass that the no nonsense ladies of Nigeria beat us to it and almost left us as depressing a memory  like Clinton’s supporters probably have…


But, truth be told, their ladies beat us at the finals in our own capital city, just like our men had beat their men to one of the Afcon male finals in their own capital city even with Okocha their then captain swearing it could never happen especially in that particular stadium… For the records, they were leading us 2:0 by half time and we somehow did it to meet up and thrash them back then…


I grew up at some point living in an apartment with a warm Nigerian family in the apartment above us… Our families still very much keep in touch today thanks largely to social media…


There are a lot of Nigerian traders and etc in this country, and the church I  went to at the time even had Nigerian Priests. Indeed, I had a few Nigerian Admirers then, although my skeptical mind at the time didn’t think they were worth even dating (rumours or statistics had it they could only play with you and then go get wives in their village)… Ironically as I write this post while at a bus stop, I just ran into one of them who was fond of my late brother Gabriel and had reached out back then to condole with me… This night however at the bust stop, we didn’t talk to each other, but we did look at each other well well (the slang is Shine your eyes) …


Hmm, there have been some pretty tense moments in our both countries affairs, people lost their cool… but that’s how love:hate affairs are right?


Things are calm now, and our country was one of the first countries their newest president visited… Its a bare 45 mins flight from Douala to Lagos you know … oh let’s hope direct flights start again soon or else you got to go by sea or road…


As for me, I am now  obsessively in love with Chimamanda Adichie’s books… Am on the last of her works so far – hmm; I can’t wait for her next book…


From her book Americana, I gather that Igbo men take care of their wives very well…if I can confirm this, and this takes me back to my first Lagos trip when a certain Mezu almost swept me off my feet to ‘spoil’ but I was still so scared then to just let myself flow in the moment – that was in 2004 – so maybe I should be open to any of such possibility now?


Marie Abanga is a dynamic woman: In her own words, «lt is worth it and life has only been this tough but good. There is strength in what remains; Trying times are not times to quit trying».  Marie blogs about her thrilling life, emotions and mental illness over at :



  1. Now that bride price part is just so funny.
    I never took the love/hate relationship btw Nigeria and sister African countries (especially Ghana n Cameroon) too seriously. Mostly saw it all as jokes n ribs..
    But i remember it hurting whenever they trumped us in male football. Lol
    Thanks Marie


    1. Dear Taime, thanks for liking my rambunctious post haha… My part two will actually have a little bit of Ghana in the mix… Seems like we cani really do without each other? It was an honour to do this and be featured on Ada’s blog


  2. Dear Ada, thanks for featuring my post. I truly feel honoured and I know that you know that this is to ‘cement’ our countries relationship 🙂
    When I didn’t see the post up on Friday, I almost wondered if you had 419 me hahaha… Ashia for the back ache oh… Hope you did have a warm Christmas. Maybe we could prolong to part 3 in real nollywood fashion? Hahahaha once more Humour may soon replace love in making the world go round 🙂


    1. Lol at 419! I was about to harass you for the part two when I realised that I hadn’t put up the first part.
      My Christmas was spent in bed. I enjoyed though.


      1. Ha Ada I envy you, in bed meaning you could read all you wanted ans listen to music and not cook but eat all you called out for? Oh , I wish I could spend my new year so o

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