Have you ever failed before? Never? Once? Twice? Does it really matter?
There was a time I was afraid of failure, really scared. I was eighteen years old and was very sick while writing exams, I was so sure I was going to fail and be kicked out of pharmacy school.
This morning I saw one of my notebooks from that era and I found that I even wrote a little (almost bad) poem, about being afraid. I didn’t give it a title and I’m pretty sure I wrote it in a hurry. Here’s the poem.
Everyone or at least everyone is happy for me,
I’m on stage one of my life’s journey,
I feel so inadequate, I’ve let this fear rule my life,
What a pity!
I’m so alone and frightened,
It feels like I’m on shaky ground.
I don’t think I can go on anymore,
I’m almost afraid to trust God,
What if his will is not for me to succeed?
I’ve never failed before,
Now failure is facing me in the face
I’ve had hard times, bitter moments and horrible experiences,
Yet I’ve never failed before.
I know there’s a first time for everything but I don’t think I can face it now.
Mercifully, I didn’t fail then. However I’ve failed many times since then, academically, financially, in romantic relationships- spectacularly even. At that time though, I wasn’t strong enough to bear it. Since then I’ve learnt that failure actually makes one stronger and that our worst fears are never really as bad as our mind conceives them.
Do I like failure? No way! I definitely hate the feeling of loss and shame when I don’t get the things I want, the things I set out to achieve. At those times, it was hard to believe that something good would come out of the setback but every time, I’ve always come out of such experiences a better and richer person.
Failure isn’t an enemy, sometimes it’s the step one in the journey to success… it’s just that It’s pretty hard to believe that when you’re down.
What’s your view on failure?