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Hold me she tells him, I’m already holding you is his firm reply.
Oya look at me she commands, he raises his head from her chest and looks at her.
I’m sleepy he tells her, allow me to sleep he begs.
She wiggles in his arms, you’re not giving me any attention she complains.
If I give you any more attention, you’d suffocate from it.
She smiles in reply, he knows how to make her smile even in a nag fest
Allow me to sleep for five minutes, then I’d smother you with attention.
She considers his point, it’s only five minutes…

An hour later she wakes up, did I sleep? She asks herself.
She sees a glob of saliva on his arm, his arm her makeshift pillow.
She’d even drooled, a sign of restful sleep
She looks up into his smiling eyes, she smiles back, a little reluctantly
He can still make me smile, she ponders
I can still sleep in his arms, many years after we’d left each other.
And no one else has she felt that safe with since then.
She squeezes his hand, she’s finally home.

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50th post!!!

This is my fiftieth post on this blog, bring out the ice cream and cake-freshly baked hot cake. It’s amazing that I’ve stuck at this long enough to have produced a 50th post, I’m as excited as I’d be if I won a hundred thousand naira in a lottery or something.

I find it hard to stick to anything, I’m more likely to start a project and be fired up and enthusiastic about it. Two weeks later not only would I have moved on, I’d have forgotten about it. Case in point, this is my fourth blog. However I’ve ‘broken the jinx’ and even after fifty posts I’m not bored yet. I even baked a cake to celebrate this feat, that’s how big a deal it is for me

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Ok I’ll admit that I had a strong craving for cake and decided to use my fiftieth post as an excuse to make one. I love hot fresh cake, surprising I don’t eat hot food but hot cake? Most definitely!

In the last week I’ve been learning a whole lot about commitment and sacrifice, I even had to undergo commitment training too. I’m hoping that I’d learn to stick to something or someone (will have to get married and have kids) even when I’m no longer interested. On Sunday I went for a programme organised by Rev Chris Ojigbani and there he also discussed commitment and sacrifice, it was like the crux of all I’d been learning all week.

Still on the programme, I learnt a lot about time and God’s will for humans. He deconstructed Ecclesiastics chapter 3- the popular bible passage about time. He said something that struck me, “if there’s time for everything, why do we bother praying? We should just wait for time to bring us what we want, when it’s time for good things, we’ll get good things and when it’s time for bad things…

The programme held at National Stadium Surulere and it was well attended. At the entry point, a man was dispensing hand sanitizers to attendees. Ebola has really had an effect on the way things are done in public places. My mum was given a dollop of hand sanitizer on entry into UBA earlier today. At least we’re more conscious about personal hygiene. It’s so horrible how ebola has managed to kill many people across Africa, may the souls of those who’ve died from this terrible disease Rest In Perfect Peace. Amen.

A literary half evening among other things

Yesterday I watched Oris officially become one of Chimamanda’s boys, after participating in the writing workshop organised by Farafina trust and sponsored by Nigerian breweries. The presentation of certificates took place yesterday and I decided to go and watch Oris blush for thirty seconds on stage.

  Oris has been my friend since 2007, I’d known him long before then, he was a few years my senior in the university. I’d seen him around the faculty and he’d been on the editorial board of the faculty’s magazine. The funny thing was that anytime I saw him it always seemed like he had a retinue of fans and for some reason I disliked him.

Imagine my surprise when I went to return a textbook I’d borrowed from a senior colleague and I found Oris in his room, my friend wasn’t around and asked me to wait at home with his roommate. Turned out the “rockstar” pharmacy student was the roommate, as I waited I was attracted to the stacks of books in the room. I took one and went straight to the last chapter, I  normally start reading any book like that, makes me know if the book is worth the effort. Oris did not bother hiding his disdain (he’ll always speak his mind) and we started discussing the merits and demerits of instant gratification and time literally flew. I found myself enjoying his company and could begin to understand why he had so many fans.

This is not an Oris tribute post, trust me if I had to write one it would have to be serialized. Where would I start from? His brilliance? His generosity? His wit? His forthrightness? Oris is probably the best read nigerian ever and no I’m not talking you uniben pharmacy students and graduates who read without ceasing to get your Pharm D. There’s no English writer of literary fiction Oris hasn’t read, I’m not even exaggerating. Back then in school he’d rather starve to buy a book and all the people who sold literary fiction in Benin-City considered Oris a friend. He also obtained two degrees in pharmacy at the same time, he’s a genius. If I’m not doing a tribute then why am I writing this flowery prose? My friend needs to start writing “the great nigerian novel” that will set the world on fire and I want to remind him the reasons why he should. Oris writes music and film reviews currently and has been featured in many publications around the world but that’s just “underutilization” of his immense talent. I’m sure his legion of fans of which I’m merely the publicity secretary can attest to that.

Back to the literary evening, the event began at 6:20pm instead of the advertised 5:00pm with a spoken word performance by Efe accompanied by a dance troupe. I loved the polka like music they danced to, I guess there’s a part of my soul that’s Russian. There are parts of my soul that are Italian (maybe it’s because their men are all the tastes of delicious), and the drama part of my soul is latino- straight out of a telenovela (T, you can’t comment on this). The MD of Nigerian Breweries gave a speech and the MC- Olisa Adibua called up Chimamanda Adichie to give her speech. That woman is fine! Her pictures don’t do her justice and I’m not even a big fan. During the cocktails, while she was discussing with Oris, I was struck by how young she looked. She can very comfortably slice twelve years off her age and no one would suspect anything.

Most of the OAPs in Nigeria should be lined up and shot! Why? They have no excuse for the nonsense garbled accents they feed nigerians with, and that’s why I stopped listening to the radio since 2000AD. Chimamanda gave her speech in a nigerian accent that was sexy, wise and erudite, and this woman left Nigeria when she was nineteen. She talked about the workshop and the validation it gives writers which is exactly what they need. I was so touched by her speech, maybe I’ll apply for the workshop next year- pipe dream. Immediately after the speech was the presentation of certificates

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the picture was taken by a beautiful lady I met in the hall.
  Oris is way more handsome than this, unfortunately the lights and the “optical illusion” of a receding hairline conspired to create this less gorgeous image of Ris, the babes who have fawned over and bedded my friend are a testament to his looks and charisma (at this point Oris takes out a contract on my life). After the presentation I stayed a while, enjoyed poetry performances by Bassey and a ten year old boy Chukwuemeka Obi-Obasi whose spirited performance impressed us all.

Soon after his performance I left the hall. You see I live with my parents who are ultra protective and being out late always makes them worried. I must have left like midway through the ceremony but I thoroughly enjoyed it.

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                      Was affected by the lights too, not looking my stunning self 😉
I left the event at the same time as Eugene of indegeneous.wordpress.com, check out his blog, he’s a fantastic guy (note to H, fantastic not nice :-p).

  I’ll be making some changes to my blog in the near future, don’t even know what the changes will be but I bet it will be fun for me and of course for you my dear reader.

PS Oris blogs at http://www.thepingofpong.wordpress.com
PPS this post was written under the influence of soft rock, in honour of Oris who’s a soft rock afficionado.

My favourite songs // Songs I like episode 8

Have you ever ended a romantic relationship? How did you feel back then? Sometimes it can be terrible, sometimes fantastic. I’m not the type to sit and moon over a failed relationship, moving on is usually easier for me. Though I don’t believe in “soldier go, soldier come”, my thoughts are- you just have to cheer up and bounce back.

Today’s songs deal with the angst that comes with a break up and of course moving on. There are soooo many songs on that subject and I’ll be putting up a few. The first song is Cher’s come back hit ‘believe’, the song responsible for the birth of autotune.

“Believe”
After love, after love [repeat]
No matter how hard I try
You keep pushing me aside
And I can’t break through
There’s no talking to you
So sad that you’re leaving
Takes time to believe it
But after all is said and done
You’re going to be the lonely one, Ohh Oh

[CHORUS:]
Do you believe in life after love
I can feel something inside me say
I really don’t think you’re strong enough,
Now
Do you believe in life after love
I can feel something inside me say
I really don’t think you’re strong enough,
Now

What am I supposed to do
Sit around and wait for you
And I can’t do that
There’s no turning back
I need time to move on
I need love to feel strong
‘Cause I’ve had time to think it through
And maybe I’m too good for you Ohh Oh

[CHORUS]
But I know that I’ll get through this
‘Cause I know that I am strong
I don’t need you anymore
Oh I don’t need you anymore I don’t need you anymore
No I don’t need you anymore
[CHORUS repeat to fade]

This song has been there for me through many sad times, not necessarily break ups though. I can listen to Believe over and over. The next song is No more the fool by Elkie Brooks. From her voice to the lyrics you can sense the anger over being foolish and her determination to be stronger.

No more the fool- Elkie Brooks
Just why I stayed around?
When all I found was heartache
I believed your every word
Didn’t know the hurt and pain that you’d make

But why did it take so long?
At last now I’ve seen the light
I’ve found the heart to say

No more the fool who waits around
Waiting for you to bring me down
Those days are gone now
No more the nights, lying awake
Crying and waiting for the day to break

No more the sound
As my dreams fall and hit the ground
While I wait around
No more the fool

You thought I’d break, then you were wrong
That I won’t see what’s going on
But I knew, here I am, I’m alive
And you see I’ll survive without you
And I won’t be the one who’ll come running
It ain’t like it used to be
It’s your turn to run to me

No more the fool who waits around
Waiting for you to bring me down
Those days are gone now
No more the nights, lying awake
Crying and waiting for the day to break
No more the sound
As my dreams fall and hit the ground
While I wait around
No more the fool

All the nights I waited for you to call
I waited for a sign that you would stay
But it’s so clear you didn’t care at all

No more the fool
No more the fool who waits around
No more the fool, no more the clown
No more the fool
No more the sight, no more the sound
As my dreams fall
And hit the ground
No more the fool

No more the fool who waits around
Waiting for you to bring me down
Those days are gone now
No more the nights, lying awake
Crying and waiting for the day to break

No more the sound
As my dreams fall and hit the ground
While I wait around
No more the fool

I had so many ideas for songs to feature here, trust me there are many songs about love gone sour. However I try not to exceed four songs per episode. Bearing that in mind we move on to Lionel Richie’s classic ‘sail on’. By now you should know Lionel Richie is my first love, I started listening to him in the womb and loved his songs before I knew what music was. Long before I knew what this song was about I had liked it, knowing what it’s about… I love it. You’ve come to realise the relationship is over despite all you put in and you’ve let go and you just want to be free.

“Sail On”
Sail on, down the line
About half a mile or so
And I don’t really wanna know ah
Where you’re going
Maybe once or twice you see
Time after time I tried
Hold on to what we got
But now you’re going

And I don’t mind
About the things you’re gonna say Lord,
I gave all my money and my time
I know it’s a shame
But I’m giving you back your name

Guess I’ll be on my way
I won’t be back to stay
I guess I’ll move along
I’m looking for a good time

Sail on down the line
Ain’t it funny how the time can go
All my friends say they told me so
But it doesn’t matter
It was plain to see
That a small town boy like me
Just I wasn’t your cup of tea
I was wishful thinking

I gave you my heart
And I tried to make you happy
And you gave me nothing in return
You know it ain’t so hard to say
Would you please just go away

I’ve thrown away the blues
I’m tired of being used
I want everyone to know
I’m looking for a good time
Good time

Sail on honey
Good times never felt so good
Sail on honey
Good times never felt so good
Sail on sugar
Good times never felt so good
Sail on

How can I have a post breakup song compilation without the anthem? The number one song for surviving heartbreak and moving on… Of course it’s Gloria Gaynor’s classic and signature song I will survive.

“I Will Survive”
At first I was afraid
I was petrified
Kept thinking I could never live
without you by my side
But then I spent so many nights
thinking how you did me wrong
And I grew strong
And I learned how to get along
and so you’re back
from outer space
I just walked in to find you here
with that sad look upon your face
I should have changed that stupid lock
I should have made you leave your key
If I had known for just one second
you’d be back to bother me

Go on now go walk out the door
just turn around now
’cause you’re not welcome anymore
weren’t you the one who tried to hurt me with goodbye
Did you think I’d crumble
Did you think I’d lay down and die
Oh no, not I
I will survive
Oh as long as I know how to love
I know I will stay alive
I’ve got all my life to live
I’ve got all my love to give
and I’ll survive
I will survive (hey-hey)

It took all the strength I had
not to fall apart
kept trying hard to mend
the pieces of my broken heart
and I spent oh so many nights
just feeling sorry for myself
I used to cry
But now I hold my head up high
and you see me
somebody new
I’m not that chained up little person
still in love with you
and so you felt like dropping in
and just expect me to be free
and now I’m saving all my loving
for someone who’s loving me

Go on now go walk out the door
just turn around now
’cause you’re not welcome anymore
weren’t you the one who tried to break me with goodbye
Did you think I’d crumble
Did you think I’d lay down and die
Oh no, not I
I will survive
Oh as long as I know how to love
I know I will stay alive
I’ve got all my life to live
I’ve got all my love to give
and I’ll survive
I will survive
[x2]

And that’s it folks!